I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
