do herpes really smell.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
