the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Randomize
