she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
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