already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
