NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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