Small penises have feelings too.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
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