Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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