he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
