i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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