Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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