are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Randomize
