I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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