Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
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