How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Randomize
