Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Randomize
