Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
