I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
