I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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