Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
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