Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
