her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
i think im in europe. pls send help
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