So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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