apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
this hospital has no fireball
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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