You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
