Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
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