if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Well I just put wine in my tea
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Randomize
