do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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