I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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