So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
