Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
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