it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
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