your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Randomize
