so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
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