I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
