First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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