she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
