Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize
