would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
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