I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
