Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
