ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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