You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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