Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
Me too!
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Randomize
