So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize
