part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
