Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
A+ Viking dick
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
