i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
