$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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