Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
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