May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
